Loose Change

Pity Party was supposed to be a lot more depressing than a lot of the comics I've uploaded; actually it was supposed to be a collection of moments that more or less introduced me to Mr. Crippling Anxiety (who later introduced me to Mr. Serotonin.) Even though Gwen's origins are nebulous in terms of who she's based on, the conversation in this comic was an actual conversation I had back in high school. There's a clincher sentence for this paragraph somewhere in my head, but I'm way too tired to think of one right now. Woops.


-GJM

Reasoning

Pity Party's back up and kicking after a short hiatus of me finishing up my portfolio for the big job. That'll go online pretty soon. On a separate page. Because it's no secret that I'm pretty ashamed of this comic.

Today's comic is about a friend we've all had. There's a human in there somewhere, but when you attempt reasoning any kind of joy into their lives, you're greeted by something more feral. And cunty.  Gwendolyn's actually based on a few different friends, because I wanted to do a comic about someone other than myself. So naturally the best solution is someone more neurotic.

Pity Party will probably be going through some changes over the next few weeks now that I won't be quite as distracted from everything else I'm doing. I have some ideas and energy to spare for now.

-GJM

Basement

Look, I don't spend a whole lot of time on Pity Party. With April coming up, I need my portfolio ready for a certain Happiest Place on Earth (TM). When I entered the wonderful world of "Don't Have a Job" (TM), I pretty much wrote every comic up to last Monday in Notepad. "Wrote" being a very loose description for "crying onto my keyboard to construct sentence fragments that remind me of horrible but true stories that I could possibly contort into a punchline." Obviously, I didn't have a comic Wednesday, meaning I reached the end of that document, meaning I spent some time writing more things.

Today's comic is one of the weirder things, and I dunno how you guys are gonna dig it, since it really doesn't fit in with the theme. On the bright side, I have something that's more "standard Pity Party" for Monday, so if you hate this, consider it a one-off or a phase or something. This is the first comic I spent more than 60 minutes on, though, so that counts for something, I think.

-GJM

Reason

Pity Party doesn't condone murder of any kind, but if someone says to you "If it wasn't for (blank) I would go out with you" or "I don't want to ruin our friendship," I'm certainly not going to stop you from taking their life.

-GJM

This CAN'T be just me

Please tell me other people do this and it's not just my fucking anxiety kicking in again. I took medication for this shit.

If you do see me in a busy city standing next to a green Toyota, you should probably grab me and pull me away so I can go back to whatever I was doing.

-GJM

Tact

Look, I'm not actually saying all old people should shoot themselves. I'm just saying that you have to wonder if the elderly, at some point on I-93, look at the long line of cars behind them waiting to merge into the next lane so they can actually drive the fucking speed limit, and ask themselves if they might be doing a disservice...

Growth: Pt. 2

I like writing/talking about when people were kids, because kids are fucking idiots. I was going to write a paragraph saying something really wise about how kids view the world, but I just posted a comic about seeing my first vagina, and I really don't know where to go from there.

-GJM

Growth

I've actually received a lot of feedback over the past week from a lot of different people, which is really awesome, because it means more than three people (including myself) read this. Which means I've successfully hit my target goal of four viewers!

But seriously, a lot of people have been telling me what they like about this, which is awesome because it gives me some direction. Incidentally, I made this prior, so rest easy knowing dick jokes aren't the direction this is going. I'd like to talk more, but I actually need to put on pants and go to my first big boy job today, so I'll talk more Wednesday.

-GJM

Levity

Today's comic is based on an absolutely 100% true story. I'm awful at interacting with older people, and cops intimidate the everloving fuck out of me, which is exactly why I don't communicate with them, ever. I recently saw two hanging out at t mall last week and found myself trying really hard to be innocent. Innocent of what, I have no fucking clue.

Maturity

Fucking Stupid

This is why you don't work on two separate strips in one day. One of them is going to be brilliant, and one of them is going to be a rushed piece of retarded fecal matter sin against God. Someday I'll look back on this strip and say "oh, that was my Unemployment Phase".

The reason it didn't come out on Friday was because the one that's supposed to go up today is a lot longer. I think it's a lot better though, so look forward to that tomorrow (Tuesday), and hopefully that'll make us even in time for Wednesday's comic.

(I do demand some credit for the text on the bottom right of the TV that's too small to read: "EmpTV". I'm a genius.)

The other reason for the delay was that I found a new job and had to square away a few things, run some errands, etc. So now I can finally go back to contributing to society after my two weeks of leeching from it. Hooray!

-GJM

Delay

Today's comic is going up later. Way later. Sorry about that, three people who read this on a regular basis (one of whom is me). Expect it up either later tonight or early tomorrow. Here's a drawing I made in the meantime.

Socialization

Today's comic is an amalgamation of a few different conversations I've had. Actually, I still have these kinds of conversations from time to time. I don't watch TV anymore (save for nightly Conan and Colbert), so pop culture is totally lost on me, and I don't listen to the radio, because the radio sucks. This makes talking about things with people difficult.

By the by, apologizes for posting this three hours later than usual. Between shoveling slush and meeting for another interview, it was a pretty busy morning. Today's interview was with a certain espresso chain; very nice manager, but very strict.

Also 4AM shifts. Oi.

Progress, Pt. 2

I'll be totally honest; today's comic is entirely leftovers from Friday's. But I wanted Friday's punchline to stand on its own, so I chopped all this off. Then I decided I liked it and made it today's comic. Plus, Friday's comic got hardly any traffic, so maybe this'll give you assholes cherished readers incentive to go and read that one first. All six of you!

The rest of my free time this weekend doing portfolio stuff. I actually have a lot of good stuff planned. I also want to add that I'm taking free commissions this week, so you can pretty much just tell me to draw anything and I'll do it. I'm excited for the other two comics I'll be posting this week, so look forward to that too.

-GJM

Progress

I can't be the only one who sees the complete retardation of text messages, or txt mssgs, or txtz, however the hell you spell it. I do it because that's how my friends stay in touch, but I can't help but feel that Alexander Bell is rolling in his grave so fast that they're using his body to drill for oil. Actually, I've had this comic sitting in my head for almost a year now so I'm glad I finally have an outlet to show it.


Anyways, I recently signed up as a member of Top Webcomics, which is a site that helps drive traffic to fledgling comics such as this. I'm gonna be that guy just this once and ask that you vote for me by clicking the link below. Every little bit helps, as I've bumped from rank 8000 to rank 1628 overnight. Hopefully when Monday's comic is posted you'll forgive me and forget I ever shamefully whored myself out like this.

Maybe That's Just Me...

There are some people that are just really difficult to talk to, and you just kinda wish that you're never forced to interact with them. The worst is when your interaction is inevitable, like in today's strip.

I'm still trying to work out the kinks of this site, so this comic's going up a little early so I can see how multiple posts are handled. Ads are another thing I'm trying to figure out, but I can't seem to stop blogger from listing five or six at a time. If/when I can get another job, I'll be sure to keep them off.

-GJM

Ain't no party like a Pity Party

I'm doing what I should have done back in high school by starting up this little web comic. I have no idea what it'll be about, but I think the name more or less entails what I want to do with it.

You can help, of course. Commenting is nice. Telling your friends would be great. Following this blog, relinking stuff on Facebook or whatever. Anything to get people reading.

If you're interested, I'm taking suggestions for stories for comics. If you have a story about something that really sucked, and are willing to discuss it with me in detail, shoot me an email! I'd love to get other people involved, and credit will be given to anyone willing to contribute. 

I'm also looking for commissions. $5 for a black and white illustration/comic, $10 for full color.

If you're interested in either, email me at gmelo412(at)gmail.com

I'm not sure how frequently I'll be posting comics, but I'm aiming for 3 times a week. But we'll see how that goes.

-GJM